Quote:
Originally Posted by doesntmatter
Meaning is subjective.
"I am fine, thanks." As much as I may want to die, I'm very good at procrastinating. Why do today what you could put off till tomorrow, and all that.
Normal folk think of suicide in terms of "I would need to be suffering so much to want to die". I, however, have to find excuses to live. Some days it's easier than others.
Well, whatever, I'm tired. Sweet dreams.
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I want you to know you are not alone in this, however I do not want to die. I want to live and live well.
However, I am terrified of failure...so much so that I get to the end of a thing and set myself up for it. That sounds so strange doesn't it? I am currently in University and in my last few classes. I am in so much pain with fear of failure that I can hardly do anything. I am actually failing a Poli Sci class and I have had "A"s in the previous 3. Why? Why am I in so much pain I am practically immobile? I do not want to fail but yet I am so afraid of it that it fights against me from completing the task at hand...something I should easily be able to accomplish.
Are you seeing a doctor?
Mine increased my meds yesterday because I am so unable to climb out of the whole I have dug for myself.
I do understand and live daily with the fear of failing, to the point I procrastinate and set myself up for failure. I know what that is and I live with it.
You are not alone.
You will find a lot of support on these forums...really.
