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summeryoga
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Member Since: Dec 2011
Posts: 329
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Default Apr 10, 2012 at 07:42 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by justforher View Post
I am not sure how to do this or what to say. My daughter is 13 yrs old, she is warm, caring, fiesty and so much fun, at least those are the postive twist I can put on things. She was diagnosised a few years ago with ADHD, but the medication and counseling has not been able to help her. A lot of her behavior has progressed to scary thing, she is right now in a residental program to try and straighten her out. At 12 yrs old she was having sex, doing drugs, drinking, sneaking out at night, had over 3000 friends on facebook (a lot of grown men she didnt know), putting up video and pictures of her in a bra and underwear, stealing and physically abusing me and her sister if we tried to say anything. Her counselor at the program has finally said she believes ADHD is not my daughters only issue, finally someone looking beyond so maybe my daughter can get help. I know diagnosis usually are done at an older age, but everything I have read about Histrionic Personality disorder screams my daughters name. I know I need an official doctor to finally listen and look at everything (although all they ask is if she is sleeping, eating, etc normal with her meds), but I want to help her....I want her to have everything she deserves. So I am here, to make myself more supportive and understanding for her. She does not feel her behavior is wrong at all and I am sure my constant frustration about what she does is not helping anything. Is there anything I could do/should do to be supportive and helpful? Also, a quick thank you....I quickly looked at some of the threads, it actually felt good...I felt some hope. If I can find someone that understands her maybe I can help her better.
One thing stood out to me in this post: Her behavior is not 'wrong'; she is just sick.

I'm 37 and have had this probably since 14 or so. I wish my mom had not pegged me as 'bad'. I wish my mom had not condemned or judged me. I wish my mom had not seen my behavior as wrong or bad. I wish, instead, that she had listened to me. I wish that she had understood that my behavior was likely caused by never having felt loved or paid attention to. I wish instead she had talked to me openly and NONjudgmentally about sex and men. Most important, though, I wish that both my parents had taken the time to see me for me, to take me out one-on-one once in a while. I needed love, and the bottom line is, people with HPD felt or feel starved for love and affection. I wish my mom had loved me.

I hope this helps in some way. I'm happy to PM and answer any questions you might have. I'm also a high school teacher, and I work with tons of teenage girls, if that perspective might help as well.

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