Whenever, my big mouth, or thoughts get in the way people get affected and hate me and cause me to become filled with paid, therefore I become obsessed in SI and to release that physical emothional pain I'm feeling and it truly helfs. it's like a decortions of releasement and love I give unto myself. Rachel says it's okay. She loves me, too. Not like most people I know here on this earthly dwelling I know. How I long for heaven to take me home!