Living with someone with APD in my opinion like living with someone on a merry-go-round. I'm Bipolar so I'm pretty much in tune with my moods and don't live in denial about them. APD people seem to have NO idea of the consequences of their actions of how it effects other people. Their capacity to show love and kindness is especially directed to children and the elderly. Mostly hopeless people although sometimes they will even verbalize their disdain for them, their actions of compassion and kindness are mostly hollow and uncaring but they hide it so well. Otherwise they can be some of the most manipulative people you will ever meet and trusting them becomes impossible at times. The will tell 5 lies and then 5 truths and get so upset at you if you question their intentions. My personal experience is that the majority of them where violated some way as a child and with learned behavior probably lied to so much themselves that becomes their norm. It can be so disturbing because one minute they are expressing genuine love and affection, then suddenly change. APD is in the cluster B personality disorder classification. I would suggest that you read about all of them because 2 or more can be exhibited but maybe not always at the same time. I was married for 30 yrs to a women with Borderline PD. She is 54 now and is finally understanding the damage that she did, not only to me but our children as well. That's really where it can become so dishearting because they blame everyone else and feel like everyone owes them something. If you can get them to a GOOD therapist, they have a chance.