My T insists that it is also a way to express myself. I can't say the feelings inside so I show it on the outside gaining a measure of relief that way. Unfortunately I sabotage my expression by not letting anyone know that I do hurt myself. My husband had no idea I hurt myself for the first 15 years of our marriage. It took a major break down on my part and shoving the wounded hand in his face for him to see my pain. I hide from my T as well. These last couple of days has shown me how I have been operating in child mode with him. I want so much to be good for him, to make him proud, that I hide what I do, only showing enough to make sure he knows I still need to see him. Not a very productive way to conduct a theraputic relationship.
Carrie

<font color=green>Should you shield the canyons from the windstorms, you would never see the beauty of their carvings.--Elisabeth Kubler-Ross