Embrace the memories. They are in the past and they stick around to remind us of the experiences we have had. I harbor a ton of bad memories from my last relationship, but I also cherish the good ones. The bad memories have taught me a few important lessons about what I deserve and what I dont. Now the bad memories are buried deep and I know that I carry the weight of them everyday. I know there were many cases where my narcissitic traits have caused some of the things to happen in our relationship and those memories are even harder to deal with. But those are the memories I am also trying to embrace. They are my constant reminder to strive for a better tomorrow, treat those people who are important to me with more love and not repeat the mistakes I have made in the past. They are a brutal weight to carry around, but they are critical to my growth and for that I am thankful that I have them.

I can say from my experiences that without embracing the bad memories and learning from them now, will only haunt you in the future. Most of my narcissistic traits I exhibit revolve around a general fear of being alone or getting hurt again. After my divorce, rather than embracing and learning from my memories I fell further down the rabbit hole and those traits I hate so much came out in greater force. Embrace the memories and use them to rebuild a better you. And to second a few of the comments, talking about it helps immensely.