This is very unfair - and pretty brutal in its execution. I can't stand Ts who do that whole 'I will always be there for you' routine. It should be banned under a code of ethics or something. It's so unrealistic in most cases.

That aside, I am so sorry for you, there's so much pain in the place you are at. Do you have good support outside of T? Can you think of some ways to take care of yourself while you're dealing with these very difficult feelings? I promise, they get better, and there is a whole lot of life on the other side. Unfortunately, there's also grief to get through first, and for those of us who have been abandoned in the past, that can be pretty intense, as it all seems to get rolled up together. Please take good and gentle care of yourself , Chloe