I just went through a big argument over this very topic. I would complain that we never "cuddle" or have more innocent physical contact. She complains that whenever she tries to do that I always want to go further. She knows damn well when I "need " to do more than cuddling! Does she ever comply ? No. In short , I believe that this is a subject that needs to be brought out in couples counseling. We both need to know each other's needs, wants , desires , true feelings, etc... It's unfortunate that we can't have an adult conversation about this.