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iwanttobelieve
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Member Since: Jul 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 1
5 yr Member
Unhappy Jul 03, 2017 at 01:34 PM
 
I have a long history of anorexia spanning 14 years that resulted from 8 years of childhood sexual abuse. Lots of hospitalisations. One recent failed suicide attempt. Ive been in therapy for the last two years. At 27 Im now feeling the physical affects of anorexia, and I WANT to recover, and Im frustrated that I still cannot eat.

I feel like a victim of my own mind. I dont want to be a revolving door patient. I understand that we can 'only sae ourselves', yet I cannot seem to 'save myself'. The services in the area where I live for people with eating disorders are sparce and Ive exhuasted the resources that are available, I also dont have the money to go privately. I also dont know how any other professional could help me in any other way in which I havent already been 'helped' in the last 14 years.

I see people younger than me, recovering. I also see people older than me living with this illness in their 40's and 50's and beyond and that terrifies me - and I know that could be me if I carry one.

Im frustrated and feel so alone, and have no idea where to turn.

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