Feb 19, 2018 at 03:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeezyks
Well... unlike you... I have in fact tried to kill myself. A couple of times I almost succeeded. However each time, after I got out of the hospital, I just went back to doing what I did before I made the attempt. It seemed to be what the people in my life wanted. And the fact was (& still is) I've been hiding for so many years... decades really... that it just seemed like the natural thing to do. It still does. So, anyway, I know something about the toll hiding can take on a person. It is exhausting. Hopefully being here on PC is of some comfort & support for you.  I wish you well...  |
Exactly. When I attempted they thought I was dead and called homicide yet I was released from the hospital within 24 hrs and went right back to work and acted like nothing happened because because well because it made everyone else feel better and well life had to go on and I had to still make money. I even hide what is going on with me now from my H. I am in a recurring major depressive episode with ruminating suicidal thoughts, I have two therapist now and I have not even told him. He is so busy and it is easy to be an actress in front of him. I go through the daily motions of the day fighting the internal battle that goes on in my head and I am exhausted.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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