Although I don't have NPD I was diagnosed 8 years ago with DDNOS and have 2 "parts" which I feel are (1) narcissistic and (2) antisocial.
So I've posted here before endeavoring to understand those "parts", come to terms with and integrate them.
I may be making some progress -- as I've come to a realization that "I'm evil, my family is evil, the whole planet is evil; but not entirely".
I feel very lonely with this point of view, although it feels "real". And I have fears that I would be rejected by most people if I were to express it. Lots of reasons why -- their fears of me ("I'm evil!"), their not wanting to have anything to do with someone who comes from an evil family, etc. Or maybe they don't reject me, but want to use me for their own purposes instead, given my feelings of desperation for acceptance.
Any feedback or suggestions?