I'll start off by saying I am diagnosed with bipolar 2. I have always been paranoid about ghosts or paranormal beings. Around 15 I was losing sleep because every time I would close my eyes I felt something looking at me- I felt I had to keep looking around to keep whatever it was away. Fast forward to 19, I had an extreme depressive episode worsened by relationship abuse. I was committed to a psych ward and diagnosed with bipolar 2. Put on meds. It wasn't until I went into an ex boyfriend of mines apartment that these paranoias came back. He told me of a guardian angel that watches over his family. I was in the trying out medications game and unstable. I was on "Effexor" when the first visual hallucination occurred. I am about to describe it so skip down if you don't want to read

.......Opaque white figure staring at me in the dark. Smilimg huge. Wearing a top hat seems like long hair. Waving his hand or both hands at me, getting faster and faster until he's just moving everyfinger rapidly. He would do the "come here" motion with his finger. What's different to me is I have to stare at a spot for it to manifest. And when I start blinking it's like it erases it for a second before it can (sometimes) come back into focus. Often I see many hands, not just one pair. I can see these images when I close my eyes too. I saw jesus on the cross made of light on the ceiling, pointed upside down towards me. I of course tried to record things but nothing really showed up. I thought I had caught it on camera a couple times (the hands) and started showing people at work. The rod that hangs down from windows to open the blinds, the end was shrinking and growing and a hand was at the bottom as if it was coming out of it, very tiny hand. I finally fell asleep due to exhaustion and the next morning paranoid as can be. I did hear some shuffling on the carpet every now and again, and when I brought it up to the ex he said he hears that often so I dismissed it. I was taken off Effexor my next appointment.

I haven't had any single stand out occurrences since then, but I still see the hands. If I look into a dark corner, dark anything, they start to come. I still experience the closed eye hallucinations if I focus on the darkness that I see when I close my eyes. I have noticed that the darkness, in a doorway or a space where there is distinct dark/light line the darkness grows for a second but then when I blink it goes back to normal. I will see white opaque animals on the side of the road running, usually a rabbit (at least I think so it's a flash in the corner of my eye) only driving at night. I have experienced thinking there is someone there but it is an inanimate object. Usually when I am outside, and of course at night.

If you've read through all this THANK YOU. None of this makes sense to me and I'm not looking for a diagnosis but more for people who can relate or add insights into this. So I've had paranoia but never hallucinations until I took Effexor (also moved into that apartment wth the ex) and now those hallucinations never went away. It's confusing. Thank you again.