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stahrgeyzer
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Member Since: Feb 2018
Location: southern california
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Default Jun 19, 2018 at 11:49 AM
 
I don’t know if I have schizophrenia. There are some criteria that I don’t have, but I do hear voices and I have very strange beliefs. Over the past decade I started feeling like my reality is not so real. I literally think I’m stuck in a lucid dream. Going to sleep at night is just me dreaming inside a dream.

Every once in while I see this scene of laying down in a hospital bed inside a somewhat dark room. I feels like my "real" eyes have barely opened a bit. I feel like this is the "real" world. There are a lot others like me lying in a bed. I’m guessing about 50. There’s a door, usually opened that goes into a lighted hallway. Uggg this gives me such chills thinking about it. It’s very frightening and I don’t know what’s happening or what to do. How can I wake up from this? I think there’s something wrong with all of us in the room. I want to open my "real" eyes all the way and get up but don't know how to do it.

The only way I could break free from this belief is to find a science experiment to give me enough proof that this reality is real and not a lucid dream but I can’t think of an experiment.

The reason I believe this is some type of lucid dream is that I’ve seen far too many things that just don’t make sense. Like for example if I’m pacing back and forth outside then quite often I’ll notice changes in the ground during each pass. Usually it’s a leaf that wasn’t there or one that moved. How could leaves appear, disappear and move around so often on the ground, but yet if I stare at the ground for a long time there’s never a change. You might think I’m just hallucinating. Yes that would definitely take some serious hallucinations, but I have a lot of photographic evidence of what is commonly called high strangeness. Like for example one time I heard “spirits” tell me to start taking photos with my phone. I took about a dozen photos outside and inside the house. In every photo there is at least one very large and bright round object that is sweeping across, as if it’s a glowing ball of light that was moving very fast. I can’t think of any rational way to explain that much less a dozen times in a row. In another photo there’s a violet glowing light illuminating the entire left side of the photo. Another time a “spirit” said I could ask a question. So I started my voice recorder app and asked a question. I heard nothing with my ears, but when playing the recording I clearly hear a voice saying before I asked the question “What’s the question?” Then I hear me asking the question. After that I clearly hear a voice answering the question. That’s crazy! I’ve always attracted high strangeness. One time while at my parents house (they were at the store) for no reason I made the well known 5 knock pattern, on the bookshelf, paused and was then going to do the following 2 knocks, but to my shock someone in the attic made the final two knocks. I tried it again, and it repeated the final two knocks. I heard my parents driving up, so I ran to the door yelling for them to come here. My dad comes running in the house. I tell him listen!! I knocked on the wall and listened. We heard the knocks reply in the attic, but they were soft. I quickly asked him if he heard that. He said yes. My mom entered the house. I knocked again but the return knocks were very faint. My Dad and I checked the attic, but nobody was there.

Some people might think I’m just being played with by bad spirits. That could explain most of the experiences. I guess it’s possible they’re bad spirits, but that doesn’t explain just how weird reality can be, not only for me but for a lot of people who also attract high strangeness like myself. Trust me, I’ve spent far too many years going down that path thinking they were bad spirits or demons. I knew a lot of christians. They talked me through all kinds of prayers. They prayed for me time after time. There was a period in my life kneeled by my bed and prayed to Jesus and God for months, but the high strangeness didn’t leave. I also wore crosses around my neck and other stuff.

Anyhow that’s a short intro to my strange belief. If there’s someone out there, a person of knowledge who can help me, then please reply or perhaps better yet send me a private message. Anyone!
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Thanks for this!
LibertyBelle