28 years. On the Eve. (it's 10pm my time and knowing me, tomorrow could bring busyness or lack of inspiration-could go either way or no way at all)
Wasn't sure if I'd be able to find this through the tapatalk app or not. But here I am and here's this thread and what a strange turn of events the past couple of weeks has been in unearthing parts of my past in healing types of ways.
Right before this event, the tarantula.
https://www.spirit-animals.com/tarantula/
Patience, says the tarantula.
Do I go the route of external factors? Because I've really reached a point in my life where personal responsibilty plays a role in choices that we make and it would really suck to sit and point fingers and cast irons. At the same time, how do I discount what was going on around me in my not yet matured state of mind? I certainly lacked stability in my external life. A constant uprooting, being a pawn in a game of custody, being a byproduct of another's internal strife.
I felt.....Ignored. There was so much inconsistency. Say one thing, do another. And left alone. Later years abandonment/well middle childhood abandonment. Was I traumatized? I'm going to say, yes, yes I was.
Being a mom of these age ranges, I'm floored. Literally floored. When my oldest asked me at the age of 12, How did I survive my childhood, he meant it.
I'm glad I didn't get further than I did. I'm glad all that sh ended when it did.
Life hasn't been a bed of roses, but I wouldn't choose to not wake up each day counting my blessings. And it's been said of me, that I do wake up as though yesterday was eons away.
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