I put the trigger thing on here just in case. It is just a trigger in thought - as in I'm thinking about things, but my T has solid boundaries. Nothing will ever happen.

I have a moderate maternal transference with my current T. Sometimes I react to her in a negative way due to the transference, however I don't generally want maternal things from her or relate to her that way. It is a positive improvement from the erotic transference I had for my last T.

So with current I I definitely am not attracted to her. However, recently I noticed that right before/during orgasm I think about her. I'm not picturing her nude, I don't want to sleep with her, I'm just thinking about her, wanting her to see/know what I'm doing.

I feel sick about it. Is this just a weird quirk thing or the start of erotic transference or worse? If need be I'll terminate therapy with her because I don't want it to go anywhere past this.

I doubt I'll ever be able to talk to her about this. I trust her, but I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable over it.