Some days I do take it personally even though I know it's his battle and his choices. Thursday he sees an oncologist to find out if he has cancer. Well they have pretty much said he has it but this will determine what kind. And I know he might choose to not do anything about it. I just accept that he is going to do what he's going to do.

I have made a life without him and live it parallel to the one I live with him. I know he's on borrowed time and I've made peace with that. But I've built up my social circle and go out with friends and get to have time without delaing with his issues. I think that's what allows me to not be so hurt by what he does.

If you ever need to talk I'm here. You can also PM me if you want to.