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Echos Myron redux
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Echos Myron redux is vaccinated
 
Member Since: Apr 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 2,157
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Default Sep 12, 2018 at 02:26 PM
 
He was outside. He apologised and said he was negotiating flowerbed positions with workmen.

I went in and put the stone (transitional object) on the table, telling him I would like him to hold it when he's ready (he was cleaning his glasses).
He said okay and I got my phone to read him a poem I wrote. I read it and I looked over and the stone was gone. He said "I've got it". I carried on reading. The poem mentioned the pendulum in his clock and how it still spins when he's not there. After I read it he asked me if he had told me the story with the clock (he put it in the room because it means there is constant movement in the room) and I said yes, I'm not completely psychic. I said he told me a long time ago but I remember.

He said he liked the poem I emailed him. He said it reminds him of tortioses, poking their heads out then going back into their shells. He said that analogy is tainted by the fact tortoises are notoriously slow, but he can't think of another animal that does that. I said maybe some sea creatures? He said yeah he thought of a crab "especially the one that takes the shells of other sea creatures" I said "hermit crabs" he said "yeah".

I said I was worried he would see the email as critical, and it wasn't meant that way. He said not at all, and he wanted to reassure me that he is examining his part in it.

I told him that I figured out part of what was happening with the arm wrestle conversation, and why I became upset. I read back over something I had written for myself about it.
Possible trigger:


After that I told him I was extremely anxious to say this even though it's not bad... my heart was racing and my chest was tight...and i told him (slowly) that I'm going on a workshop run by his ex therapist. I tried to justify it the whole time I was saying it. He said it makes sense, it's a subject I'm interested in and it's a specialist subject of his ex-T's. I said I was anxious he would feel I was doing it just because it's his ex T.
He said he doesn't think that but it's important to notice my anxiety and that it's linked to previous times when he has felt intruded upon. He said he is sorry I felt anxious.
I told him I think his response here will be added to the tapestry of my experience of his responses just like his past responses and will play a part in how I expect him to respond in the future. He said he noticed he's curious about how his ex T is, he hasn't seen him in a long time.

I asked for my stone back, he said it might be warm. I said "good" and he laughed. He asked me how that had worked as a connection experiment? I said good I think but time will tell as I wanted him to hold it for it to help me between sessions too. I said it felt nice to have him hold it in session.

I told T I bought dobble to play when we feel disconnected or when we need a change of pace but I haven't brought it today. I talked about playing it with my kids. I said it is more practical than chess or arm wrestling.

We talked a little about how time passes and how he lets me manage the time. He said he always sees quarter to till 5 past as a crucial time. I said yeah and things often get brought up at that point. Which is another reason i was anxious about the workshop conversation. We stood up, hugged (without me asking) and went to leave.

A lorry was coming and he said it's delivering stones, watch out. I said I'll try not to get run over. He said or a stone dropped on your head. I said have you risk assessed this?! He laughed and said No!. I said seeya next week and left.
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