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Jessica Hazlitt · Oct 15, 2018 at 03:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ididitmyway

Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about it.

Once you start having intrusive thoughts about the therapist, it means your therapy has entered the sad (IMO) transference stage.

One thing that has a slim chance of making this situation better is if you talk to your therapist about it and if they take it seriously and explore these thoughts with you extensively and also if they show appreciation of your courage to talk about it. So, under those conditions, MAY BE (and it's a big "may be") the thoughts won't be as intrusive as they are now. But the chances are they still will be intrusive.

I don't claim that I "know" exactly how this works. All I know is what I know from my own experience and from what other people have been saying about their experiences.

IMHO, when therapy ends the transference stage, in most cases, it goes downhill from that point on, sorry for the gloomy forecast. Some people may have different experiences with this, so they might strongly disagree. I am just giving my perspective.

My T and I have spent the last couple of years taking about my feelings for him very openly (I'd have though I'd be past this stage)It is difficult, but some interesting stuff has come out of it. This is new though, especially prolonged. My worry is we seem to have so many balls up in the air at the moment, and there's a good chance come next May that my time will be up and will have to leave. If we start taking about this too its just another potential open wound to be left unresolved. Normally I wouldn't hesitate to bring stuff up, but (especially as up until last session T was taking about 'maybe' ending then changed to 'we have until May') I'm really feeling the clock ticking. I don't want to make ending worse than its going to be.