Hi Guys ,

As many of you know I lost my parents and can not grieve there loss , I have Complicated Grief Syndrome .

I just took the "grief" test and scored a 52 , high for anyone suffering a loss.

I can only speak for me , one on one therapy has saved my life so far ,I did go to one group and all they did was talk about how bad they feel , I thought no kidding , so how to I get better ?

There were no answers , just stupid people wanting something.

There are days I am up and days I just want to go for the long ride , and say screw it.

If I were not in therapy , I probably would have taken that long ride , I still want to sometimes , but I remain.

Days are so lonely , and I am always thinking of things I should have said , things that might have saved my life when they were alive , but all that is gone now.

Having Complicated Grief Syndrome is hard enough , but when you toss in the dysphoria of me being trans , the anxiety and depression , I so often wonder why I am here , why me.

I am nothing special , I just try to help , sometimes I can`t do that .

Soon I wil not be able to do anything , and then there really is only one logical choice.

Just needed to write somewhere , I now , what a downer , yeh , that`s me.

Catch you guy`s later thanks for listening to me type : LOL

Keyplayer 