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wrestlingmom
Junior Member
wrestlingmom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 13
5 yr Member
Default Oct 28, 2018 at 12:49 AM
 
Hello, this is my first time on the board and I am desperate for a friend and advice. Here’s my story. I’ve been married 22 years to my husband. Most of it has been a hardship, especially over the past 10 years. I was young and stupid when we married and didn’t see how selfish a person my husband was. Over the years, he moved from one job to another, always leaving or getting fired because he could not get along with people. He did what he wanted instead of putting the needs of our son and I first. He destroyed so many relationships with friends because he was demanding, wanted his way all the time and was mean. Eventually, people had enough of his behavior. Three years ago his behavior got so bad that he had got into significant legal trouble. Over the years, my resentment of him and the harm his actions have caused myself and my son (now 15) have grown to the point in which I want nothing to do with him. I filed for divorce three years ago, then foolishly dismissed it because he didn’t have a dime to his name and knew he would end up homeless, and I did not want my son to have to watch that happen. He has pretty much been depressed since that time and not worked. He has undergone extensive treatments for anxiety, depression, OCD, etc. He has been involuntary committed for 48 hours twice, been through depression day programs twice and is now on his second week at a day program for OCD. Even though he goes to the OCD program during the week, each weekend he lays on the couch and does not shower. He sometimes goes a week without showering. My son can no longer have friends over because of this. Even though we have decent health care insurance through my employer, most of his therapy is not covered. Today, I received another bill of $2,000 in the mail and it threw me over the edge. I am living paycheck to paycheck and don’t know what to do. And, he doesn’t have a care in the world about paying bills, so the worry all falls on me. One of the most upsetting things is that he is on Valium only and I have voiced my opinion to countless therapists and left messages with his psychiatrists that he is not properly medicated. His last doctor put him on Paxil which I knew would be a disaster because it puts him into a manic state. After two months, his doctor stopped that medication. It’s extremely frustrating because he doesn’t want the doctors to consult with me because IMO he has a borderline personality disorder and some form of bipolar depression, and he does not want me to say that to his doctors. I have no family to lean on and I alienated my friends because I felt so depressed and ashamed and just didn’t want to talk about any of this. The only person that could offer help is my husband’s mother, but she is an extremely selfish person who is too busy getting manicures, her hair done and going out dancing with her friends to help her family. I am desperate for help and any advice would help.
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