Thanks for sharing your struggle. I'm sorry I don't think I am the right member to be replying to your post. But I noticed no one had yet replied. So I thought I would. You mentioned having recently been diagnosed with a panic disorder. So here are links to 6 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on that subject plus 2 on how to cope with panic attacks:

What Is Panic Disorder? – Psych Central

Panic Disorder Symptoms

Panic Disorder Treatment – Psych Central

Frequently Asked Questions about Panic Disorder – Psych Central

Living with Panic Attacks – Psych Central

https://psychcentral.com/lib/what-ca...anic-disorder/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/lib/tips-to...-attack/?all=1

Also, since you mentioned the possibility of having Asperger's Syndrome in your title, here are links to an article on that subject plus one to the autism test that is available here on PC:

https://psychcentral.com/lib/asperge...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/autism-test/