I can relate to this somewhat. My brother is seriously mentally ill (mostly OCD) and refuses to do therapy. For years he also refused medication.

Now he is seeing a psychiatrist who is prescribing him high doses of anti-psychotics, and I don't think they are helping with his symptoms and are causing him to gain weight. I'm lucky that I don't live with him, but my parents have to take care of him. He literally can't do anything for himself. He is in his 30s and my dad has to bathe him. Otherwise he will not shower. He doesn't flush the toilet after he uses it. Dad does that. He won't put the medication in his mouth. Dad does that too.

He was going to a residential facility for OCD, but he only stayed a few days before they made him leave. He wasn't put the medication in his own mouth, so they said he couldn't stay there. He just seems to be getting worse, and it's frustrating when he won't do therapy. There's only so much other people can do. Honestly, if he weren't my brother, I wouldn't have anything to do with him. I have to think of my own mental health first, and being around him makes me worse.

I'm just wondering if you're taking care of yourself. You shouldn't be expected to do everything for your husband when he won't comply with treatment. If I were you, I would seriously consider leaving him.