My Support Forums - View Single Post - Parent with severe depression causing me Anxiety

Mangojuice411 · Nov 11, 2018 at 09:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

Hello Mangojuice: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral.

I don't know as there is a lot I can offer here. I also have tinnitus, by the way. And I've also struggled with back issues. I've never undergone back surgery though. And, thankfully, my back-related issues have subsided as I've aged. You mentioned your dad has seen many doctors (as I understand it) for his tinnitus with no relief. Unfortunately there is no cure for tinnitus at least not that I'm aware of. It's simply something one has to learn to live with. I once had a procedure performed, by an ENT physician, which is referred to as a "perfusion". It supposedly helps although I'm not at all convinced it did any particular good in my case. There was a period of time when I suffered a severe (thankfully temporary) surge in the level of my tinnitus. It sounded as though I had a freight train running through my head 24 / 7!

During that time period, my psychiatrist gave me a prescription for Klonopin. And that helped.

I'm glad your dad is going to be seeing a psychiatrist. That is a good step. It might also be beneficial for him to see a mental health therapist as well. I don't know how these sorts of things work where you live. But where I live, all psychiatrists do is to prescribe & monitor psych med's. Any & all discussion regarding what is happening with a person emotionally is left to mental health therapists. And so, while seeing a psychiatrist is certainly a good thing to do, not also seeing a therapist is sort-of like hopping along on one leg, if you'll excuse the analogy.

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time with this. I have to tell you I think your boyfriend is right. You're 23. Your life is still just beginning. It's not in any way appropriate, to my way of thinking, for you to be towed under by your 59 year old father's problems. You have your own life to live & it's past time for you to go out & begin living it I believe. I know you wrote you feel guilty. And that is certainly to be expected. Perhaps this, along with the anxiety you are experiencing, would be good things for you to be seeing a therapist about. Having a mental health professional with whom you can sort through all of your feelings regarding your dad could be helpful in putting all of this into perspective.

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

Thank you so much for your reply and for all of your advice. Hearing from someone else who has tinnitus is extremely helpful as I often wish I could understand the agony of the ringing. My dad has described it exactly as you did with the “freight train” noise and it rarely dies down for him. He also had quite a few procedure done, similar to the one you described and found little relief. I cannot even describe how much I sympathize with those afflicted because I see how my dad’s personality has dramatically changed into a downward spiral. He has tried many different antidepressants and also takes Clonazepam and muscle relaxers etc. It is just so hard when he lashes out and I don’t know it if is from all of the medications or if his mind without the medication would be the same. The mood swings are just terrible and it breaks my heart to see him in pain. I know my feelings of guilt should not be as pronounced and my mom always tells me not to worry about him as much as I do but it is just so difficult for me as we have been so close my whole life. Again, I cannot thank you enough for your insight and your kind words you definitely helped me understand and feel a bit better about the situation! All the best to you and thanks again!