Hello Lostandconfused: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral.
One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the relationships & communication forum. Here's a link:
https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/
You didn't mention, in your post, whether or not your bf has been diagnosed as having any kind of mental illness nor whether he is, or has been, in any kind of mental health treatment. However even if he has not, it is certainly true there are many people in the world who could potentially be diagnosed as having a mental illness but who never seek treatment. Still their mental illnesses affect every aspect of their lives. From what you wrote, whether or not your bf has a diagnosed mental illness, it sounds as though he is struggling with some things that are affecting his life & unfortunately have now had a serious impact on you.
Sadly, I doubt there is much of anything you can do that will bring your bf back. He will either decide he made a mistake & come back of his own volition or he will not. One thing you will need to be careful of is, should he come back, will he again change his mind & leave a second time... or even a third? The situation you find yourself in at the moment could be a red flag for how things will continue to be should your bf return. You mentioned your anxiety is bad & you're not well. It may be a good idea to consider seeing a counselor or mental health therapist with whom you can sort through your feelings.
Here are links to a selection of 10 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that hopefully may be of some help to you in putting this situation into perspective & with figuring out where to go from here:
You Can Only Change Yourself
Are You Waiting for Someone to Change?
Help on Healing from Heartbreak
12 Ways to Mend a Broken Heart
https://blogs.psychcentral.com/succe...ow-to-recover/
https://psychcentral.com/blog/lettin...dium=popular17
https://psychcentral.com/blog/coping...dium=popular17
https://psychcentral.com/lib/recover...dium=popular17
https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...nful-emotions/
https://psychcentral.com/blog/growth...dium=popular17
I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
