I do get it. But how does anyone determine what I deserve? I understand from what I've said here that this seems so obvious he can't respect me. My own gut knows this. I have dished it back at him at times. I can say things that hurt him just like he hurts me. Who knows I deserve "better", or that there is "better" out there? I've experienced a few short relationships, well, I won't even consider those "relationships" in the last 6 or so years, other than with this man. I didn't see anything better. Maybe I'm getting soured on men and need my own space. I think divine or golden said that any kind of commitment won't change things. I know that is true. But he hasn't been a complete jerk ALL the time.I