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Old 12-02-2018, 05:07 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
Member Since: Apr 2014
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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seesaw grieving
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 6,359 (SuperPoster!)

5 yr Member
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Default Re: Grieving

It's still rough. He seems to be stabilized after the initial weight loss. I'm not sure the prednisone is doing much but he doesn't seem to be losing MORE weight. He's being picky about food but he will eat some things for me, so that's good. Gonna go broke buying chicken breast for him, lol. He's turning down wet dog food. So I'm strategizing. I've had to do like 3 meals a day for him the past week to try and stave off the weight loss.

I'm hoping the vet will okay me taking him up to the mountains next weekend. However, I'm reading a lot of different things about when to help them pass. I don't want to wait for him to get too sick to eat or poop or stand. He really has very little energy now and I'm not sure it will get better. I'm sort of hoping I'll get an idea in the next few weeks, that he'll show me. I think if the weight loss begins again and his appetite staves again, then it will be time. I'm not going to let him suffer any more than he has to.

I'm still having a hard time with it. I cry a few times a day. I do think it's more hard because I'm living with making a decision versus it being over and grieving...I think I cry more because I am unsure what to do for him, not because he's gone. That may be selfish, I don't know.

He did have enough energy to come up on the sofa and get in my face briefly this afternoon. He has done that in a week. Wagging his little tail. I thanked him for giving me some love.

I'll miss his smelly farts when he's gone.

What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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