Forums at Psych Central - View Single Post - One way Xmas gifts and cards...
View Single Post
Old 12-03-2018, 12:26 PM
DechanDawa's Avatar
DechanDawa DechanDawa is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
Location: United States
Posts: 3,112
DechanDawa DechanDawa is offline
Grand Magnate
DechanDawa's Avatar
DechanDawa upleveling
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
Location: United States
Posts: 3,112 (SuperPoster!)

3 yr Member
913 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: One way Xmas gifts and cards...

Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
I give gifts to people regardless of reciprocation. it's not a gift to me if it's got expectations tied to it and the gift of giving is just that, to me, giving. But then I don't expect others to have to give me anything nor feel that they are ever obligated during holidays or my birthday. If you're a friend that is someone I care for, I'll likely give you something at Christmas if I can.


Freeing yourself up from the obligation of doing what others do for you or expecting them to reciprocate materialistically is really one that lifts a weight off your shoulders, if you ask me.


When it comes to reciprocation, in general, that's a whole different ball of wax which I won't go into here. Keep in mind I'm merely talking about the gift giving thing alone.











IDK. I think most people think in terms of a balance. I have one friend who I love dearly and I sometimes will send her gifts or cards for no reason. Often she will then send me cards and gifts. I would like to tell her, "Hun, you don't need to return gift me..." but, you know, she likes to keep everything perfectly balanced.


I think this is coming out of my having a very difficult year this year financially.


As well, the brother who never sends me gifts or cards is extremely wealthy...having married into extreme wealth. So it is weird for me to send them gifts when I am practically living at a poverty level. IDK. It just started to feel strange.



Some years I just like to even things up. Kind of tidy things up.


The one friend I mentioned, though, I am just very lavish with gifting her no matter what my situation is because she is my BFF -- and has been a lifelong, so very loyal and cherished friend. We have been friends since we were children and are more like sisters than friends.
__________________

DechanDawa is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
"Thanks for this!" says: