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DechanDawa
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DechanDawa LEAVING
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
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Default Dec 03, 2018 at 04:01 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Human3284 View Post
I send gifts to people and they don't gift me back, but I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I want to give them a gift because I appreciate them, don't gift them so they gift me or it seems you're only giving to recieving instead of giving because you truely want to give. IMO once you start giving people stuff expecting something in return then you truely aren't doing it for the giving part anymore.

Just my opinion though. Also I like to write notes because cards are everywhere, a hand written note with your feelings is much better IMO.




Okay, I have a different take on this. I feel if you give people stuff and they don't give you stuff - your so-called generosity - could be making them feel uncomfortable. Like you want something from them. Or they may feel they owe you something...and they don't want that.

When we give something we are sending a message. If we keep giving and it is not reciprocated...the other person might be sending a message. The message is that they are not partaking in an exchange. If they don't even thank you for the gift it seems like they are saying...they don't really want you to be gifting them.

I have thought this over in this thread. And from now on I am not going to send Xmas gifts or cards to people who do not do the same with me. I think they are sending a message that they don't want to connect on that level.

I will take that money and donate it to a good cause at Christmas like to a nature conservancy. Or an environmental group. Or buy food and donate it to a community food bank. In other words...give where it is really needed. And will be appreciated.

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