Yes... change certainly can be painful. I know this is my personal prejudice but... I personally believe seeking help or support from family members or friends is really a lost cause in most cases. They don't know what to say or do. And, besides, they have their own problems & don't really want to have to deal with yours. As a result what you'll often hear from them is some variation on "just do this, that or the other thing" which can come off as controlling.

You mentioned you don't like seeking professional help because you feel they will try to control you. I don't know what types of professionals you've seen of course. A good therapist won't try to control you. So if you're seeing, or have seen, a therapist who tried to control you perhaps you're just seeing, or have seen, the wrong therapist?

Of course, the other consideration here is that there is such a thing as resistance in therapy. And so, if you're in therapy or have been & you began to feel controlled, perhaps this is simply a case of resistance? Here's a link to an article, from PC's archives, on the subject of resistance in therapy:

Resistance in Therapy-Why You May Not Be Getting Better