Hello iutlh: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral.

I don't think there is really anything in particular I can offer in the way of advice here. You summed the situation up well in your post. So you know what the circumstances are as well as your options. At least to my mind, it's "simply" a matter of you deciding how you want to proceed. I know sometimes there just isn't a good answer to something like this. There are just different ways to proceed each with its particular benefits & drawbacks. I recall once saying to a therapist I was speaking with, regarding my own situation, that I knew what my options were, I just didn't like any of them. However at some point, at least to my way of thinking, one simply has to decide one way or the other & let the chips fall where they may as the saying goes. Perhaps other members, here on PC, will have some more helpful advice to offer.

There are probably dozens of articles on the subject of divorce, in PsychCentral's archives, I could link you to. However here are links to 8 that hopefully may be of some help to you as you weigh your options:

Burned-Out on Your Marriage or Relationship?

I Hate My Husband! Why That Is So Normal | Psychology of Women

Are You Ready For Divorce? 8 Questions You Should Answer

Want a Divorce? Stop the Emotional Yo-Yo and Be Clear About It

When One Spouse Wants Out of the Marriage But the Other Doesn't

https://psychcentral.com/blog/should...es-put-it-off/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/psych...ons-not-to-be/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...ge-and-thrive/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.