Thanks everyone for your input. The situation unfortunately has not gotten better. He continues to wallow in his condition. He has a doctors appointment in two weeks but he has been feeling worse because of the smoking. Naturally. Which in turn makes him hurt more, so to cope he smokes more. It’s all just madness.

I really miss the man he was when we were first together. When he didn’t feel so poorly. When we could go do things. Be active. Now we sit in a dark house almost all the time and it’s no wonder both of us are going stir crazy.

So I will see how his doctors appointment goes. But if he can’t get his act together, something has to change. Even my family has started to comment on the fact he doesn’t work and just sits at home.

I miss the man I fell in love with. I truly do. But I know I can’t just wish him back. I am trying to support this person that has taken over my love’s body. I hope he will reappear. But if he is gone and this negative and bitter person has taken over, then I can’t continue to put myself through this.

Part of me feels bad for even considering leaving given that it’s due to a medical condition that he has no control over, but he does have some control. He can take steps to try. I think he’s given up on himself. And if that’s the case, I can’t help him. I just have to try to save myself.