He wrote me a goodbye letter. While it wasn't as emotional as I hoped, there was alot of good thoughtful things in there. He's so good about being open to future contact too, not saying either of us will care in 2 yrs but it's nice to know there's that option.

I've decided to try my best to make the best of it. Respect his choice, even though I don't understand it, and realize that, it will make him feel less anxious if we meet again.

I think I'm gonna make a scrapbook. Is it weird to put our texts chats there? I wont feel so sad deleting them then. Plus I got alot of pics of him and some papers he gave me with stuff on it. Rather than being angry and throw it out all and regret it someday, I think it's best to do this.

The good thing is... I am making plans in my future. Trips and moving and such. Things to keep me busy and to look forward to so I'm not constantly obsessing over him. Hopefully it helps. I think the holidays will be the hardest but once I'm though with that, it might be easier for me to manage.