Greetings.

So I've been thinking lately that a lot of my issues might be due to ADHD or some kind of related issue.

You see, I'm currently enrolled in community college working towards a web development degree. School is hard for me because I get bored easily. I can't keep myself focused no matter how hard I try. I am terrible at test taking because I can't focus on reading and memorizing the information. As a result, I average a low C or high D on most of my tests. However, I do well on hands on stuff requiring me to do something that is fun or interesting to me.

School isn't my only issue either. I have trouble committing to things or people because I get bored and decide it's not worth my time. Heck, I have trouble committing to therapy or dealing with my childhood trauma because of boredom most of the time. Last time I saw a therapist, she wanted me to write something in a journal as part of some homework, I got bored with it and never returned.

Also, I don't get a lot of value from my time. It isn't uncommon for me to get lost in my head and daydream when I need to do something I don't want to do without realizing it half of the time. I slack off on my chores because chores are boring. I didn't get my apartment clean until the other day and that was only because pest control was scheduled by my apartment people and I didn't want people coming in seeing the filth I live in so I finally got the apartment looking presentable enough (trash wasn't piling on the floor and coffee grounds weren't spilled everywhere anymore). I get bored at work and end up getting hyper and making jokes when I should be working. I'm actually surprised I lasted as long as I have at this job because it isn't all that uncommon for my work performance to degrade because I would rather think about something fun like video game strategies, an epic anime battle, the secrets of the universe, or one of my many ideas than move some stupid tables for a bunch of people that don't give a crap about me. Oh, and I can get angry at somebody or something but become calm and completely forget about what even made me angry 5 minutes later.

Also one of my best friends who I've been open with regarding some of my mental health issues (because he has them too), flat out asked me one day if I had ADHD because when we were talking, I couldn't keep eye contact and I wouldn't be able to hold still. He said I tend to look everywhere when we talk and that I seem restless and fidgity, and he mentioned that I have a habit of changing subjects rather quickly.


So yeah, I know there is an issue. I can't help but to think that my quality of life would improve if I got more value out of my time. I just can't stay focused no matter how hard I try. I know they say you needed to have issues with ADHD as a kid but I was never diagnosed. I was diagnosed with explosive anger disorder and oppositional defiant disorder though so maybe those count. I'll try to get a diagnosis soon but it's just hard getting places when I live in a state with **** public transportation without a car.

Anyways, thoughts?