MickeyCheeky, Thank you for your response and input. I agree, it's very unhealthy. All of the things that I am worrying about are related to crisis's that he keeps causing with his explosive outbursts. I have talked to him dozens of times about it all. And his employers and coworkers have been complaining to him this last year as well. So it has led him to finally looking into help abut a month ago. He suspects that he has a neurological condition that he was supposed to be tested for when he was a child, but never was. So I am trying to sit back and give him a chance to get help for his lifelong issue. I have come to terms with the fact that he may never follow through. By February, he should have all the testing, etc. completed. So I am trying to hang in there until then. If things don't start changing after that, then I know I will need to divorce at that time. But I am crumbling under the pressure in the meantime. And I need to be at my strongest right now.

His issues are dominating my life. And I'm letting that happen all day long even when he is not around. .... and I'm sitting here typing this out and just had an "A ha" moment. My daily planner has had 1-3 "To do" tasks of his each day. So even when he is not around, I still can't be left alone to do my stuff. Every day, all day long, I'm doing things for him. Wow. Did I just wake up.

Thank you. Just you responding with your input, was enough to help me figure out why I feel like this. Thank you. Your a complete stranger to me and you just made me feel immense relief. That kindness means so much right now. Thank you