I'm diagnosed with BPD and PMDD (Pre-menstrual Dysphoric Disorder). The PMDD tends to make BPD symptoms worse and happens on a monthly basis. The severity of symptoms seem to change from one month to the next. I recently (October) stopped treatment for PMDD at gynaecology and my body is now all over the place again whilst it levels back out.

So the past few months I've been hearing a voice. It only tends to happen either during 'that time of the month' or when stress is at an unmanageable level. And there's been a lot of that this year for various reasons.

This voice is... almost like mine I suppose. But younger and more darker sounding. And by darker I mean she's just in a constant mood about everything; she sounds angry and low all of the time.

She tried to really come to the surface a couple of months ago and for the first time ever I think I spoke back to her. I only told her to go away, or stop it - something like that. And she did for a bit. It was really scary and felt like a step up from the normal BPD symptoms I experience.

I once tried to describe her to an ex. The ONLY comparison I could come up with was Angelica Pickles from the Rugrats! She's that level of sass, but darker and less screechy and annoying sounding. That's who I envision she looks like though - a meaner version of Angelica, and that's saying something.

I'm going through the thick of PMDD and psychosis at the moment, and yesterday she was there constantly. Every thought I had about something, she was replying to it - sneering at it. Everything was dark and pessimistic. She encourages me to kill myself too.

The only saving grace is I'm somewhat self aware and able to push the responses to the back of my mind and generally not act out on whatever this girl is saying.

So. Is this normal? Can this be another symptom of BPD? I'm afraid it's manifesting into something else entirely, but couldn't say what as I know very little on psychosis and what other conditions could create this experience.

I start therapy on 17th January. As far as I'm aware it's the year long psychotherapy that includes DBT, but not entirely sure on that until I go for my first intro session. I just really hope it works because I'm otherwise stumped as to how I deal with this. I need to get back to gynaecology to look into and try to treat the PMDD symptoms again as well.