Your post is helpful to me. Basically God knows all our mistakes before we make them, but I wish He'd prevent me from making them. I guess they are our tests, and we are supposed to pass but don't causing the misfortunes in our lives. But I look to him for guidance. And I found I passed one test he thought I would fail suicide. I didn't have a life plan after that non suicide attempt. I floated. I eventually made plans of my own and am still feeling like I'm in charge of my destiny. But He's around. Anyway, your post helped me rationalize my failings.