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Anne2.0
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Member Since: Aug 2012
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Default Jan 14, 2019 at 06:46 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by DP_2017 View Post
I was well aware the texting would end then. Actually when i sent the photo that am. I wrote, i know you lose your phone soon but I wanted to send this so you could see it before. I knew exactly when it all ended and he had no reason to assume I'd think we'd keep texting

Also it's funny you mentioned b&w thinking. He brought it up often and even in his goodbye letter said something about remembering its not always or never. I even sent this text screenshot to my friend who is pretty rational compared to me and she said it sounded robotic
A couple of things stand out to me with the text. One is that even if the text sounded robotic, or may have actually been robotic, it doesn't mean his tone or affect or feelings in the moment were actually that. Even if he was feeling robotic in the moment, it could have been not about you or your relationship, but some kind of overwhelm about wrapping up his work and starting a new job, lots of paperwork and other stuff to take care of in that context.

I also wonder if he could have been nervous about texting after the last session, worried that it constituted "contact" before the 2 year period. He does seem to be driven by the "rules" in that issue.

The other thing that strikes me is that the robotic text was just dealing with the issue in front of him right now, responding to the photo. He didn't ignore that text. The happy holiday text that he ignored seems more benign in that way.
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Thanks for this!
DP_2017