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gmts
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Member Since Dec 2016
Location: Germany
Posts: 205
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Default Jan 22, 2019 at 09:16 AM
 
Dear all,

BPD ist not really my issue, but I'm wondering if my father(and his father) might be affected. Until recently I had thought that BPD was a disease that puts you completely "out of order", but maybe I am wrong.

So, my father(and his father alike) always "functioned", he had a decent career, had the discipline to get up every morning. He was properley overseeing for the family finance, taxes, insurance and all other paper work. He made sure that the house and garden were well maintained, etc. He was only an occasional and light drinker, I can remember 2-3 times when he was a bit tipsy, but never hammered. And he never touched any drugs, worked out, etc. He never saw a shrink, he never took any medication.

On the other hand he alwas had those incredible rages that came out of nowhere and were totally unjustified. Either it was only about a minor issue or it was completely made up, it only existed in his head. And those rages lasted forever and were constantly increasing.

And he always denied it. If he ever admitted something then it sounded that he had *maybe* lost it just a *leedle* bit, but that he had all good reason to be mad. Which both is completely wrong. Grotesquely wrong.

And that *I* had to apolgise to *him* that I had made him so upset. Which I then really did because I had no choice as a child. And that was the worst part of it all, which was why I moved out as soon and far away as possbile and kept ever since only minimial contact. He is very old now and it's pointless trying to "fix" anything now. But of course it is always sad for me.

But right now I'm wondering if his condition might be BPD, if only a rather light version of it.

What I can say for sure is that his emotions are totally out of control, he is unable to regulate them and they don't match the reality at all. And I had always thought he was making it up, that he was gaslighting me and everything so that he doesn't have to admit anything, but by now it starts dawning me that maybe in his reality he really *is* right. That he really sees it like that.

And that makes me wondering if this could be a case of BPD?

I would be very grateful for your opinions!

Best regards
Frank
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