You're not "crazy", Sò leigheas. You're just struggling, and it's not your fault. DID can have many causes, and yes, what you mentioned may be it. It's clear that you're trying your best to cope with it. I'm so sorry you're struggling, my friend. I hope your situation will improve soon. Please don't give up. I hope talking here helps a bit. It's not much, but at least it's something. Stay safe and take care of yourself, my friend. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I just wish I could do more to help you or offer more advice. But I promise that I'll listen. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. You know I'm always available to talk. Sending many hugs to you