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Old 01-25-2019, 09:20 AM
Azzurrella Azzurrella is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2018
Location: Italy
Posts: 41
Azzurrella Azzurrella is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2018
Location: Italy
Posts: 41

5 hugs
given
Default Re: How long?

Hopefully
Thank you for your messages.
I really appreciate your words.
I have difficult to accept the help of a therapist, for many reasons.
First I realize that I have difficult to accept that the only person who maybe can listen to me is someone I have to pay for. This reflects the poorness of my entourage, the poorness of my family, my wrong family unable to support me in such a struggle. And I feel really unlucky for this. I have two parents but it seems Iím alone. For them is important only that Iím alive and well nourished, they only worry if I donít eat.
This reflects the poorness of the place I live in. But in this moment I cannot leave it, for many (also economi) reasons.
This reflects the difficulty in creating new friendship, I live in a small place. Even if my colleagues loves me, even if Iím greatly respected at work, I have no friends to do something with them, to talk with them. Iím now living as an old woman with nothing in her life but her job, and her old and heavy parents.
And the second reason why Iím refusing a therapist is that I will feel loser in this struggle. My ex husband didnít care about anything, heís carrying on his brilliant new life, while Iím going worse. I perceive the therapy as the admission Iím worse than he is, Iím more worthless than he is, Ďcause at the end itís me that needs help. He succeeded in destroying me, as he wanted.
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