You deserved much better than that, Sò leigheas. You deserved to be loved and to be happy. I'm so sorry for what you've been through. Please don't give up, my friend. You have every right to lead a normal and happy life. Just take it one step at the time. Try to hang on. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Take baby steps. Remember that we're always here for you if you need it. We all love you here. I know it's not the same thing as having a support system IRL, but at least it's something. Keep writing here if it helps. I'm also here for you, my friend. I'll listen to you and won't judge you. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Sending many hugs to you