Hello spaghettios: Thank you for sharing your concern here on PC. I'm sorry you have experienced all of this difficulty in your life. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support. I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central.

I'm sorry there is really nothing I can offer with regard to what you have experienced pretty-much all of your life it sounds like to me. You mentioned having seen therapists, psychs & social workers. But I wondered if you've been evaluated medically perhaps by a neurologist & / or other specialists. I'm neither a mental health nor a medical professional. But what you described sounds as though it could perhaps have a neurological basis to it?

Yes, having the problems you've had could certainly cause you to develop depression, anxiety & PTSD as well as some additional mental health issues I would surmise. But I, at least, have to wonder if perhaps there might be something physiological behind it all. Of course I don't really know. It's just a thought. I know in my own case, although it has never been diagnosed, I have to believe I have some (perhaps fairly minor) brain damage from years of bumping my head every night as a child to go to sleep. I've always had difficulty with controlling my temper & people who have suffered brain injuries often exhibit poor self-control.

Anyway, if you have not had yourself thoroughly evaluated neurologically, I would think that might be something to consider if possible. I hope you find being here on PC to be of benefit.