@
Iamhiding I totally get this. My t, who had some experience in eating disorders, totally did NOT understand when i said i felt like this. As a result, i think i felt totally invalidated by him on this one point. But its kinda a big one.
Are you allowed to take care of yourself in other ways? Are you allowed self-agency, independence? For me the answer was no, absolutely not. It sounds funny, but yeah i was emotionally bullied with food - "dont feel bad, eat this - see you're okay now, so that means
you werent really upset!. Now go away." Not the best parenting technique. It leads to a very weird relationship with food.