I am new here, and assume my post has been addressed in the past. But since I’m new, maybe forgive please.
Triggers, stupid, dumb, recurring things that are meaningless out of context, but just send my emotions skyward. Just now, as every year this time, there are advertisements by local groups on TV, wanting to create wonderful high school prom experiences for disadvantaged girls. While I did get to go to a couple of high school proms, and other high school ‘date’ dances, I never had the chance to shop for a prom dress, shoes, makeup, hair salon, jewelry, none of it. My parents were both malignant narcissists, and would never allow for any of the household budget to be spent on me. No braces for my horrible crooked teeth, no dermatologist treatment or acne products for my ice pick scar creating acne, certainly not a pretty dress for prom. I was always able to borrow a dress, shoes, wrap, from another girl who would never wear the same dress a second time. Why, oh why, did my parents not love me?
Today I understand they were ugly people on the inside, but the triggers...decades later. The scars. I don’t think I will ever recover from their abuse. Ever.