Please, if you are afraid you might hurt your self call 911 or a suicide helpline. I can't answer your poll because I don't know you yet or your partner. Have you thought about couples counseling? For practical matters - ie: vomiting, you can try to treat yourself like you have stomach flu - small amounts of chicken broth and Gatorade every couple of hours.
I am sorry you are scared and hurting. You are a valuable human being just by being you.
Keep posting so we know how you are doing