Quote:
Originally Posted by saidso
I'm sure that it depends where you live, but I have a mad technique for dealing with this. I go up to the adult very very politely, and say, "Excuse me, is everything/ are you/ ok?"
Usually what happens is a moment of utter astonishment, and then the adult starts unloading all of his/ her problems onto me and completely forgets the child. Then I walk down the street a short way with them both.
It came to me because a friend from Sierra Leone told me that her people always intervene if a child is being scolded.
Probably I'm just a weird person or I live in a relatively safe neighbourhood: you do have to "act" genuinely concerned despite your own emotional reactions. It seems to, at least temporarily, deflect all that emotional angst from being offloaded on the child.
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here in the USA its not the best thing to do (walking up to strangers who are acting out aggressively and abusively)
here police go into schools and colleges and community events and teach never to place yourself in a position of danger. never try to interject yourself into a domestic (family) violence or child abuse situation. we have just every day people who have permits to carry concealed weapons (guns knives and such). its one of american constitutional rights to bear arms kind of thing.
if a person is acting out agressively with a child they have obviously lost control of their emotions and temper. this can lead to the aggressive person pulling out a weapon and going after not only the child but also all bystanders around.
plus if a person is acting out aggressively in public against a child what is that person doing behind closed doors of their home? many times when strangers interfere here in america the abuser appears calm in public then takes it out of the child or others in the home. a situation of they may have been able to stop me out at the store but what I do here in my home is my business and now you are going to get it worse because I had time to wait and stew about it kind of thing.
here they teach in schools, colleges and domestic violence/ crisis centers to never put your self in a position of danger where you can end up on the receiving end. the good intended help my result in your own death and making it worse on the child. to instead document then report to the proper authorities.
please be careful of putting yourself in danger like this.