If you think there's a risk, puzzclar, then I guess it's be better to avoid cuddling. I'm so sorry, I know it must be really hard for you. Please don't give up. I think you're handling all of this pretty well. I admire your strength and will. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this