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sarahsweets · Feb 19, 2019 at 06:23 AM

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Originally Posted by MaroonAbalone

To be frank, for years I've always been speculating if I am autistic, and watching home videos of myself added to this suspicion (I can explain further in future posts if anyone is curious, and I'll try my best to talk about them). Factors such as my depression, social anxiety, my inability to understand how to socialize adequately like others, and failing to maintain decent relations with friends & family have jeopardized the way I live my life. Going to my therapists for general anxiety fixes aren't working, so I guess bringing this up could give potential answers. One of them actually assumed if I was ever diagnosed with autism because I mentioned I experience spontaneous bursts of crying/anger and even hurting myself in these fits (ex. hitting).

What is your diagnosis? I know its tempting to have a gut feeling and then research it enough to feel that you have settled on something but its not always that cut and dry. Yes, some of what you mentioned sounds like autism but some of it sounds like the idea of what people think autism is. What I mean is the mainstream has an idea of what autism is and those ideas are shared widely and often cloud the pervasive symptoms of something. It reminds me of the general public's view of bipolar- that we are moody and shopping up a storm when we are manic and trying to kill ourselves when we are depressed. I am not saying you do not have self awareness to know what is going on with you but I encourage you to see a psychiatrist and see what is going on.

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I honestly am not sure I am autistic 100%, to be fair, cause this is just a strong hunch. All I know about autism in my family is that my dad's sister's son is autistic on the low end. However, I don't truly know if it's because it's been genetically passed down my family tree or if it came from her husband. I researched passing down autism as best as I could, I could be missing info.

I am not clear on the hereditary factors with autism, maybe someone else can share.

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I just want answers, that's all.

Felt like sharing this, but last year, I searched up if autistic people could be self-aware, and I was surprised to find that generally those who are high-functioning are. That was the time when I finally understood that autism is not as simple as it's believed to be and that it's a spectrum. I felt like sharing this b/c it was interesting.

Before they came up with autism spectrum disorder there used to be Asbergers. My sister was diagnosed with this when she was 3. She is 28 now and has always lived a relatively normal life with the exceptions of her boyfriends but I do not think its related to her diagnosis. One thing that helped her was therapy tailored to autism.