I am having memories come back of 2010.My narc sister was trying to drive me to suicide and let my mum's house get in a mess with years of stuff left lying around,I had neighbours that were trying to drive me out of my neighbourhood and set fire to my garden fence.The police took the neighbours side,she was young and blond and a mother,and I was ill mentally and lived alone,even though it is hard to set fire to the fence post if you are trying to the police believed her story that the fence went up on fire by accident when she discarded her cigarette.One minute she was out there smoking the next their is a crackling sound and my cats came to find me and were distressed and the neighbour had left her house and locked her doors.The fence was ablaze and the post burnt right through.The police said witnesses said I harrassed her and they tried to give me a caution and asked me to sign the papers,I ripped them up and refused to sign,she sets fire to the fence, arson and you caution me I said,no way.As soon as they turned up and found out my house wasn't council and I owned it,they took against me,they wanted me to be council so they could have me evicted on an anti social order,I asked them to get the fire brigade in to investigate how the fire started and they wouldn't,if I had set fire to the fence I'd be put in prison 10 years,she gets away with it!

Back at mum's place,I had to go stay there cos my neighbour's husband was threatening me and harassing me,my sister was trying to drive me mad and she was trying to wear my mum down and kill her too,she made the house look old and decrepid to get my mum to send loads of money on it,she pulled tiles off the wall and she left the smoke alarm bleeping,when I asked mum,why did she leave the smoke alarm bleeping she said my sister told her it was supposed to do that,the lying cow,she was trying to drive my mum mad.

I completely tidied and cleaned mum's house so that it wasn't chaotic,cos too much clutter drives me mad,but then when I went home,I found hoards of stuff hidden away and got it out to organise it in my house and there was so much clutter there wasn't room to move and it made me mentally ill but I was too ill and exhausted to tidy and take stuff to the tip,no transport ,no physical strength,no one to help,and me going crazy.I threw myself in front of a car,and the police came and threw me into the back of a prison van and took me to the mental hospital,they treated me like a criminal and were physically rough and verbally abusive to me.

The memories of all that are very painful,especially the police throwing me in a prison van when I was suicidal and traumatised and them letting my neighbour get away with arson.But the doctors at the hospital knew me and they let me stay there and come home everyday to sort my house out,and when my sister who told me to kill myself saw that I had help she started helping me too,she refused before,She even tried to come to my house when I was in psychosis and she wanted to shout so the whole neighbourhood could hear that my neighbour was a good woman and I hadn't been taking my tablets and had caused trouble,she took the neighbours's side,my own sister was against me.I thwarted her by refusing to let her into my house.

This was when I realised my own sister was a fascist and wanted to kill me or somehow undetected bring about my death.It was such a traumatising time,I was sectioned three times in 18 months and it was a nightmare to get my head straight and some of the hospital staff were abusive and provoked me,so they could inject me with tranquillisers,cos one staff nurse was a lesbian who got her kicks out of having women patients forceably held down and injected,she liked to watch that.

Later much later years later,I found out my sister was a narcissist and then I understood all the abuse and trying to hurt me, making me mentally ill,she had done that deliberately with the intention to cause me harm and bring about my death.She always used to say that she would never intentionally hurt me but it was calculated and deliberate,the arguments deliberately provoked to tire me out and drive me mad,the lies she told,always abusing me then denying she had done anything wrong,forgetting thing she had said that were nasty,deliberately forgetting,denying,controlling my every movement,refusing to let me be independent then saying I was dependent on her and incapable of managing on my own,yet she sabotaged all my attempts at independence.

All of these memories are upsetting me today.If I didn't have here to vent these memories would definitely make me ill.I feel like I don't matter,like no body cared and no body cares.I so very much want justice against my sister and my neighbour for the harm they caused me.