Feb 19, 2019 at 03:37 PM
How is everyone else doing? OK eating wise today, but the stupid ED and exercise. I actually went jogging in light/rain drizzle in the dark (early morning). I think the running in the dark thing might be mixed with the bipolar, sort of a manic (risky) behavior. My bipolar is type I with mixed features and it seems the "with mixed features" is mostly my default, unfortunately. I may have lost some more weight. Looking bonier and haven't weighed myself in 4, 5 days. I'm tempted. But I guess the good thing is I only take the weight after using the bathroom in the morning as my normal weight, so once I've drunk or eaten anything, I don't bother. Don't know if I can hold out much longer. I wish I could, but IDK.
Why do we put so much of our self-worth into a stupid number on the scale? And so much so that even 1 or 2 lb. more or less makes a huge difference. Ugh, EDs just suck.
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD
Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost
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